The Simplest Peacemaking Tool To De-escalate Any Situation

For today’s Talk Less, Listen More Thursday Tip of the Day, I attest that this works. As a conflict mediator, this is a foundational tool I inform all parties involved before the mediation. It sets an important tone and is a critical a ground rule to achieving an effective mediation session.

Below are additional Talk Less, Listen More Thursday video tips to help us all cultivate compassion and empathy. It is through good communication skills that we—as a society—can get closer to peace and love. I truly believe there is nothing good communication can’t solve.

What are other tips and strategies to help us move closer to peace and love?

In community,

Jenny


First Filipina & Black Ballerina Lead in NYC Ballet’s ‘The Nutcracker’

Charlotte, you go girl! This is a momentous holiday season for 11 year-old Charlotte Nebres and for Asian Americans and African Americans. Charlotte is the first Filipina American and African American ballerina lead (playing heroine Marie) in New York City Ballet’s The Nutcracker. Finally.

Representation is consequential. It has conscious and subconscious, explicit and implicit effects, especially, for those that can identify with the lack of it.

“I saw her perform and she was just so inspiring and so beautiful,” Charlotte, 11, said. “When I saw someone who looked like me onstage, I thought, that’s amazing. She [Misty Copeland] was representing me and all the people like me.”

When Charlotte was 6, Misty Copeland became the first female African-American principal at American Ballet Theater. That, she remembers.

Misty Copeland

I too remember. I remember my vivid awestruck when I saw Asian American actor Dante Basco as Rufio in the movie Hook. He was the first person I saw on TV and in film that resembled me. For people of color to see individuals like them in positions of visibility, power, and success, it is incredibly validating for our identities, confidence, aspirations and affirming that we matter. We do matter. Charlotte you matter.

Dante Basco as Rufio in Hook
Not only was Rufio a main character but a fearless leader.

The firsts. Asian American Pacific Islanders are still underrepresented in many sectors. For example, actress Kelly Marie Tran who plays Rose Tico in Star Wars went from being the first Asian American and woman of color lead character in The Last Jedi (and in all of Star Wars) to controversially only having one minute of screen time in the follow-up film The Rise of Skywalker. Also, in stark contrast to his counterparts, data analyzed by Axios Media demonstrate the disproportionate lack of media coverage in comparison to polling numbers for Asian American presidential candidate, Andrew Yang. And for the first time in U.S. history, there are three Asian American Pacific Islanders running for 2020 presidency: Andrew Yang (Taiwanese), Kamala Harris (Indian and black), and Tulsi Gabbard (Samoan and white).

Actress Kelly Marie Tran as Rose Tico, the first Asian American and woman of color lead role in Star Wars. Photo courtesy of Screen Rant.
Rose Tico later removed from the original Star Wars merchandise designs.
2020 presidential candidate Andrew Yang. Photo: Jeff Neira, Walt Disney Television.

Additionally, in every article I have read about Charlotte Nebres, the titles and body text consistently say “first black” ballet lead and neglect to say she is also the first Asian American ballet lead. Too often Asian American Pacific Islanders are left out, forgotten, a footnote or an afterthought; yet Asian Americans are the fastest growing racial and ethnic group in the U.S. Asian Americans are more than the harmful stereotypes: other, outsider, quiet, invisible, passive, meek, subservient, the model minority, good at math, terrible drivers. The list is endless.

Despite it all, Charlotte, you are positively challenging the misconceptions and false narratives of Asian Americans and African Americans. Thank you for overcoming the odds. Thank you for being the first. Your success is everyone’s success.

Charlotte Nebres. Photo courtesy of Heather Sten, The New York Times.